Old Notes on Life

Life is all in the little things, isn't it? Life is the stuff all wrapped up and gifted to us in the tiny moments, the brief and fleeting images right before our eyes.


I'm letting life drift by. I'm scared but I wonder if this isn't my coping mechanism, a distraction from the anxiety of having to live well, of having to find happiness in small things. I don't know what my obsession with "BIG" everything is. I want everything to be big and noted, I want every moment to drip with the juice of big, serious meaning.


I must learn to stop and smell the roses. I must learn to take everything in, to accept that sometimes it rains and sometimes the sun shines. It doesn't have to hold a deeper meaning. I should just accept the way the sun feels on my skin, how the rain drops feel on my arms and legs.


Tomorrow I will try just being, just following the moments of the day as they morph and flow into memories. I have to find the life in the small things, suckle the sweet nectar of life from the bud of the day.


I wrote these words on June 30, 2009 and found them in an old journal today. The 30 or so pages written in the big beautiful red journal gifted to me on my 18th birthday contain some really poetic thoughts that blow me away. Did I really write these words?

Honestly, it's been a long time since I wrote down my reflections on my nature, my life and our whole big, silly world. Old readers of this blog will have noticed my lack of really personal reflections of late. (I'm sorry if you really enjoyed them.)

I fell in love close to two years ago now and I've been working really hard in school and on outside activities. There's been very little time to sit and ponder how I feel about things and what I think of life.

For a very long time, I searched, high and low, for the meaning of life. I thought that I could make sense of it all by writing about my boring life. I thought writing would make my life interesting.

Turns out, I finally got it right on June 30, 2009, and while it took me a while to actually do so, I have just been. I have followed the moments of the day as they morph and flow into memories. I have found the life in the small things. I have suckled the sweet nectar of life from the bud of the day.

Life isn't always what you hoped for or what you expected, but at least you're alive. Right?

3 Great Ugly-Duckling-Gets-Made-Over Movies

Right around this time of the year, I start wanting to give myself a whole new look. This is probably inspired by my love of the three movies listed below. I watched them all repeatedly when I was a kid, and as one who was frequently teased, I always hoped that I could get made over and change my life.

Never Been Kissed (1999)
This film, starring Drew Barrymore, is one of my favorites. Josie Geller, a less-than-memorable editor at the Chicago Sun-Times, gets her first assignment: to go undercover as a high school student. For Geller, who barely survived high school the first time around, this is mixed blessing. In the process, she makes friends with the popular crowd and falls in love with teacher Sam Coulson (Michael Vartan). And in the end, when she's standing on the pitcher's mound waiting for Sam to give her her first kiss, she's gorgeous.

The Princess Diaries (2001)
Mia Thermopolis is one of my favorite heroines. I loved the books and the movie is fantastic. Mia, an unsightly 15-year-old, finds out that she's actually a princess, and her super chic grandmother, Queen Clarisse Rinaldi, gives her princess lessons and Paolo, a pompous gay man who considers himself a great artiste, gives her a makeover. And with one look at the results, it's clear that he knows something. I just love this one!

She's All That (1999)
Rachel Leigh Cook plays Laney Boggs, a high school student very serious about her art but not her appearance. Zach Siler (Freddie Prinze), recently dumped by his popular girlfriend for a reality TV star (played by Matthew Lillard), makes a bet that he can clean up any girl and make her popular. Laney is the victim of the bet but the beneficiary of Zach's lesbian sister's make-up skills. I always wished I could meet a Zach who would make me over and fall in love in the process.

My Latest Obsessions

I have kind of an addictive personality. And these are the things I've been obsessed with lately (and most of them are food/drink related):

- Magazines: This one's kind of a life-long deal. My latest faves: Marie Claire, Vanity Fair, Esquire.

- Smores pizza at Maxi's (Liacouras Walk, Philadelphia, PA): This is nutella, fluff and cinnamon & butter blended together on pizza crust. Just yummy.

- Hot chocolate at Good Karma 2 Cafe (928 Pine Street, Philadelphia, PA): I never used to like regular hot chocolate but whatever they do to their hot chocolate at this place, it's incredibly scrumptious.

- Sweet Iced Tea at Eppy's Steaks (a truck at Montgomery and 13th Streets, Philadelphia, PA): As the girl who turned me onto it said, "It's like crack."

- The Vampire Diaries: I know, I know. It's so cheesy. But I just love it. And I'm kind of dying that there won't be a new episode until January.

Cool Reads: 11/17/11

For Felicity Jones, Her Clothes Play the Role, Too - Journalist Courtney Rubin got a lot of great information, anecdotes and quotes from actress Felicity Jones in this piece about how Jones greatly influenced the costumes of her character in the much-talked about indie film, Like Crazy, in which she stars alongside Anton Yelchin.

Marilyn Minter's Oozing Desire - Linda Yablonsky writes about artist Minter's slow-motion video "“I’m Not Much But I’m All I Think About" in great detail -- with lots of $10 words. Some of them she made up, I think, but still an interesting read and a great reminder that you should use great, unusual words.

Fatties Need Love Too (An Uncool Read)

I'm sorry, but I have a bit of trouble with women who think a size 12 is fat and that a man can't love them when they've gained a few pounds. And bam! There in the back of the November 2011 issue of one of my favorite magazines, Marie Claire, is an article titled "Til Pounds Do Us Part." Written by Theresa O'Rourke, the piece is about how the author gained some weight and the weight was coming between her and her husband.

O'Rourke begins the piece with five paragraphs about her and her weight gain. Altogether the piece is 17 paragraphs long. She only really gets to talking about her "rock-star lean" husband in the seventh paragraph, which suggests to me that her piece is less about her husband than the weight gain. And possibly the piece is really about how her husband's view of her was influenced by her own feelings that she wasn't sexy.

Her husband comments in the twelfth paragraph that if she looked like she had when they married, they'd "have 10 kids by now" and this triggers "the most honest talk we've ever had," O'Rourke writes.

Her conclusion is that her husband's laziness influenced her and thus she gained weight. "For every way we enriched each other's bad habits, we had caught each other's bad habits, too, like a cold," O'Rourke writes. "And we knew that without care, we would just keep passing them around."

Still, after this, she concludes that the "care" had to begin with her and so she joins a gym. That's how she wraps it up. Really?! This piece at 740 words tries, but fails to make any single, strong point.

If the wedded couple were at fault for each other's flaws, then why weren't the two of them going to the gym together? (And as an aside, if the husband is so rock-star lean, then how was it his laziness that made her lazy?)

Also, she mentions stress causing her to drink a little more than usual at the beginning of the article. Might not her inability to handle stress productively be part of the problem?

Furthermore, if the author's own unease with her body -- and her mentioned unsightly wardrobe -- are really to blame for her husband's own lackluster feelings for her new shape, then what about dealing with her own issues? There are skinny women who have expressed disease with their lack of curves. If O'Rourke really gained the weight in the "right" places, i.e. her breasts and butt, then what's so bad with her new shape? Google image-search the words "5'3 and 165 pounds," which is how much she weighed after gaining pounds, you'll see some normal-looking women.

What's wrong with normal or even slightly overweight women? Especially if you own it?

So, I beg of you, what was the point of "Til Pounds Do Us Part"? Journalistically, it definitely could use some work. For any modern-day feminist, it's a bit of an outrage.

Cool Reads: Writing for Writers, 11/4/11

Here are a couple of blog posts from The Renegade Writer that I think are really useful.

5 Tips to Finding Story Ideas That Sell - This post on The Renegade Writer is really informative for newer freelancers like me. Most of these tips sound a lot like the information Becky Batcha, Philadelphia Daily News editor, gave my class about generating story ideas. Still, it's good to read these things a few times so it all really sinks in.

5 Packaging Ideas to Make Your Article Idea Stand Out -- Instead of submitting a query formatted in the usual way, why not entice the editor with a quiz or with clever subheads?

Becky Batcha, Philadelphia Daily News features editor, on finding story ideas

Batcha, a newspaper editor, says journalists should
view the world through "story goggles."
(Eye candy courtesy of weheartit)

Today in Magazine Article Writing class, we had a visitor: Becky Batcha, features editor at the Philadelphia Daily News. Batcha, who got her start in trade magazines and has since freelanced and edited at national glossies, daily newspapers and weekly alternatives including the Boston Pheonix and the now-defunct Child magazine. During her talk in our class, this sometime Temple University adjunct professor, talked about how to find story ideas, especially trend story ideas.

"Philosophically, you just need to have your eyes and ears open," Batcha said. You have to wear story goggles, Batcha said. This means you have to be prepared to view the world differently than normal people. To illustrate this point, she put on a pair of oversized black-framed glasses. As a journalist, "you need to be able to spin a story out of just about anything," Batcha said.

You have to know what makes a good story. For trend stories, the idea has to be new. "Anything that makes you say 'huh' might be a story idea," Batcha said.

Next, she showed us some clips she'd written and pieces she'd edited and explained where the ideas came from.

One such example she provided was the source of a story she edited, entitled "Childhood: The New Battleground State," which won the 2007 Clarion Award for magazine coverage of a major news event. This story, about how the nastiness of politics trickles down to students in elementary school, came from an anecdote a friend told Batcha over dinner. Batcha's friend's child came home from school and said that they couldn't vote for Al Gore because he was a baby killer. This anecdote got Batcha's wheels turning and she assigned the story to writer Susan Warner.

Just last week, she went for a walk around her block and noticed that the Halloween decorations weren't just black and orange but green and purple. From this "germ," she came up with a story for the Philadelphia Daily News on the change.

Then she provided examples of how she'd put together a trend story. One such example was this:

Batcha, who is a firm believer in reading everything you can get your hands on, read this tidbit in Leslie Kaufman's article, "Stone-Washed Blue Jeans (Minus the Washed)" which ran in the New York Times yesterday: "To customers seeking further advice, Levi Strauss suggests washing jeans rarely, if at all — the theory being that putting them in the freezer will kill germs that cause them to smell." After reading that, she got to thinking about a couple of other trends she'd heard about: Those with curly hair are shampooing less frequently because they believe it's better for their hair. And her son, who's in college, told her that people aren't using deodorant. The three of these together would make a great story called "Permission to Be Totally Gross? Granted." for a female consumer magazine.

A couple of other things she shared with us:

For her first pitch, she read a lot written by the editor she wanted to pitch and channeled her voice when she wrote her pitch. Of course, she'd also done a ton of research.

LexisNexis is a great resource; any idea you get you should check on Nexis to see if it's been covered.

"Every magazine editor reads the New York Times every day," Batcha said. And we should too, she asserted.

Finally, cold calling and cold pitching works! The editors don't need to know you as long as you can prove you're a good writer.

Cool Reads: 11/1/11

There's a fantastic oral history of Ms. magazine, the first magazine run by, written by and made for women, on New York Magazine's website. Check it out here.

Cool Reads: 10/31/11

Here are the articles caught my eye today:

- Mona Simpson's eulogy for her brother Steve Jobs (The New York Times)
- "Desperate Housewives: The Reinvention of the Main Line Mom": Proof that motherhood just isn't enough -- even if the jobs they take on don't involve curing cancer (Philadelphia)
- This piece about fiction writer Wells Tower's week spent working in a marijuana coffee shop in Amsterdam, titled "My Kushy New Job." Has the makings of totally fantastic gonzo (or ganja) journalism! (GQ)

(Above image from weheartit)

Cool Reads: 10/30/11

Some of the stories I'm reading (or will print out so I can read them):

- Frank Rich on Occupy Wall Street
- An interesting Q&A with Rich on Sarah Palin's political career
- This article about Adam Gopnick's new book The Table Comes First: Family, France and the Meaning of Food. I definitely want to check out the book!
- "Gravel Pit" by Sasha Frere-Jones about "The voice and times of Tom Waits," a musician revered by one of my favorite musicians, Jessi Teich.
-Published back in September, I just got around to reading Jonathan Safron Foer's piece, "Speechless," for The New Yorker's The Talk of the Town section. It's a fantastic, if brief, exploration of how we're capable or incapable of discussing difficult things.


The coolest thing I've read all day?

Johnny Depp's recollection of his friendship with Hunter S. Thompson, author of the novel which The Rum Diary is based on.

The COOLEST Read

I die. There are very few times when I quote reality TV stars, even such a popular stylist as Rachel Zoe, but this is one of them. A friend of mine, Peak Johnson, wrote a profile of me for The Huffington Post.

Enjoy!

Cool Reads: 10/14/11

Journalism students should read all the time. Here are a few suggestions in case you're in training like me, or are just looking for something interesting to read.

Blog Posts & Short Articles:

"Why You Can Thank Modern Family for the Sitcom Renaissance" by Josef Adalian: This blog post over on NYMag.com investigates the resurgence of the half-hour TV sitcom. It's not a sociological thing as some might think; it's really just good business following the success of Modern Family.

"Google Said to Be Planning an MP3 Store" by Ben Sisario: The New Yorker's Media Decoder blog reports that Google is planning to sell music. Why did they wait so long? "Google may be hoping to announce its store before Apple opens its latest cloud music program, iTunes Match, which was unveiled in June and is expected to be operational by the end of October," writes Sisario. My guess is it's also connected to the recent death of Apple's Steve Jobs. But why his death is expected to affect business in a negative way is beyond me...

"Occupy Wall Street: Art Meets Politics in Zuccotti Park" by Zach Pontz: Really captures the mood of the movement's artists and protestors. "This is something that is rare for me. I’m a creative guy, not a political guy, or a business guy, but at some point it became clear that there’s no way to get around this issue anymore," artist Wolf Geyr told Pontz.

Longer Pieces:

"The Hunter in Johnny Depp" by Nick Tosches: You learn something new every day. Like the fact that Johnny Depp loves the word "Fuck," and all of its forms. (To read the full article, pick up a copy of the November 2011 Vanity Fair issue.)

"Why Me?" by Ian Parker: Based on his roles in 30 Rock and It's Complicated, I've had a crush on Alec Baldwin, who's about as old as my dad. Sadly, this article -- proving that he's far removed from the cocky man I found attractive -- killed that weird crush, but I really enjoyed the writing.

Two Pulitzer Prize winners visited class today

Neal Santos of Philadelphia City Paper took this
picture of Wendy Ruderman (left) and Barbara
Laker in their workspace at the Daily News.

Can you spell the word "AWESOME"? It truly is the best descriptor of today's Magazine Article Writing class, during which Pulitzer Prize winning journalists Barbara Laker and Wendy Ruderman from the Philadelphia Daily News. Here are some highlights:

Wendy: It's a really fun job. [On talking to strangers:] That's the best part is going to the streets. It's a pain but then once you start, it's really fun... [But] People want to talk to you.

Barbara: People in the neighborhoods want to talk to you.

Wendy: Some stuff -- door knocks [as in seeking to talk to the families of the victims of tragedies] -- I hate.

Barbara: You'll give whatever it takes to get the story. Be empathetic and connect [to your sources] on a personal level... Once you give someone your word as a reporter, you have to keep it.

Wendy: There's always the police version [of a story] and the other guy's story and everything in between.

Barbara: People are gray and you learn that the more stories you do.

Wendy: The older you get the more thing start to bother you [she said, referring to cases such as the story you write setting free a drug dealer].

Barbara: [On getting someone to talk who doesn't want to] You have to appeal to them and think, 'Why would they want to talk to me?'

Sometimes our political future really terrifies me

Admittedly, I'm not very politically savvy -- certainly not as savvy as a Philadelphia committee man and journalist should be -- so I occasionally turn to my favorite media, magazines, to shed some light on the fuzzy stuff.

Today, I'm reading "Debt and Dumb" by Simon Johnson and James Kwak over on Vanity Fair's website. It discusses the Tea Party's attack on Alexander Hamilton's legacy. According to the following quote, it's also attacking institutions and agencies that help citizens. "Rick Perry, Mitt Romney, Michele Bachmann, and the rest of the Republican candidates are running for president on the idea that today’s federal government is far out of line with the original intent of the Founding Fathers," write Johnson and Kwak. "The Constitution, in Perry’s view, permits only a narrow and specific list of activities to be run out of Washington—and Social Security and Medicare are definitely not on this list."

The writers go on. "With their steadfast resistance to taxes, their hostility toward central government, and their willingness to risk a national default, today’s Republican candidates tap into a different American tradition—one that begins not with tea but with whiskey: the Whiskey Rebellion of 1794."

Excuse me if I'm wrong, but aren't all of these insane Republicans also filthy rich? I'm sorry, but they can pardon with some of their wealth to support the health and well-being of senior citizens (if these wingnuts will support no one else, why not the senior citizens? Do these Republicans wish everyone to work until they die?).

The article goes on with an interesting history lesson that I think these Tea Partiers should pay close attention to...

Cool Reads: 10/9/11

As you should know by now, I'm studying magazine journalism at Temple University. While I've had some experience through internships and running M.L.T.S. Magazine, I still have a lot to learn. As often as I can, I'm going to do a post like this with a few good stories I've read. Here's one for today:

This New York article about the NBA owners calling for a bailout. It illustrates just how murky the basketball league's finances are and adds something else to the list of things Occupiers should fight.

Check out my baby, M.L.T.S.!

Open publication - Free publishing - More beauty

M.L.T.S. Magazine finally launched its first issue last week. Check it out here, through Issuu, or head over to MagCloud and order your own paper copy for $15. Part of this goes toward helping us build our business!

I really hope you enjoy it. Check inside for a reprint of a previous VTPJ post!

Hopefully I'll be posting here more often in the next few weeks. I miss you guys and I hope you feel the same!

Sorry I've Been M.I.A. (I'm Also M.L.T.S.)

Please pardon my absence. By now, I'm sure you're aware I periodically go into hibernation, at times with warning, at others without. This time I haven't really been getting much rest. Instead, I've been busting my hump to try and launch M.L.T.S. Magazine, my new baby and Vered's The Penny Jar's little sister.

M.L.T.S., as Mama will heretofore refer to the magazine, is an online quarterly publication for college-aged women driven to achieve all their dreams. This is the modern girl who wants it all and wants to look great doing it. She is Wendy Healy, Nico Reilly, Victory Ford, in college. That's the elevator pitch, at least.

It is so much more than just this to me. It is my dream. For a while, I've wanted to start my own magazine. I first made my own magazine in 6th grade; I'm sure you've read this story. That little rag was called RoZgIrl, had a limited run of just 10 copies that I painstakingly copied on my parents' table-top copy machine. This magazine sparked controversy among my classmates and it never came out again. After that I tried to make Rosie magazine and Couture & Culture both a reality. Neither were produced on any scale.

With the creation of Issuu.com, a little more experience under my belt, and the emptyiness I felt following my separation from The Temple News, I finally decided now was the time to launch. As of right now, we've got a wordpress blog. The first issue will go live on or very soon after June 6th.

And apart from my mother who doesn't understand why I decided to push forth on this at this point in my life, it has had pretty good reception. The PR reps I've been in touch with to get stories, interviews, samples, etc, have all had kind things to say. Journalism students are loving the idea and applying in spades to write for us.

So while I'm sorry that I haven't been posting regularly here, you can imagine how pleased I am overall. Ahhhhhhh, I'm making something happen! It's a great feeling.

I'm going to try to get back to blogging here about my personal views on things. If you don't hear from me for a while, check out M.L.T.S. (or do so anyway!) and follow me on Tumblr, where I post quick notes, pictures, and videos. I hope others who have the desire to start their own projects consider Notes From An Editor their inspiration.

A Flash Collection

After playing with InDesign a little, I produced this: "A Hard Knock Life," a set of two flash fiction pieces.

Check it out!

Open publication - Free publishing - More stories

I'm considering publishing my novel in a serial format through issuu.com...

Love Lesson No. 3: Shared Interests Aren't Everything

This is a series of lessons I've learned about love, arranged in no particular order. These lessons have been gleaned from personal experience, friends' stories, movies, books, magazine articles, etc. If you want to share a lesson you've learned about love, email me (rosellaeleanor@gmail.com).

When Tom Hansen described how perfect Summer was for him, his little sister said something very wise. "Just because she likes the same bizzaro crap you do doesn't mean she's your soul mate," she told him.

I make mistakes and when I do, I apologize

In my last post I called someone I work with some very unfair things. My basic complaint -- that this girl doesn't really communicate with me in a way I would like or consider appropriate -- remains, but by calling her names I am no better.

I am very sorry for the way I reacted.

This is not the first time I've had blogger's diarrhea. On occasion, because I'm only human, I blog about a situation that is upsetting me and although I know they're just my feelings and opinions, I write stuff that others might take as fact or hold against the person or thing I wrote about.

This is something we are made to consider in journalism classes and it's something I wish I'd considered this morning when I wrote that post.

There is a mature way to stand up for yourself when you feel like you're being talked down to, and name calling isn't it.

I only hope others can learn from my mistakes.

Walking tall

My mother's always pestering me about my posture, and yeah, I do need to learn how to pull my shoulders back and push my sweater puppies out there. But today, whether you can tell by my outward appearance or not, I'm walking proud.

For the past few days, I've noticed that I have this new sensation -- the feeling that someday someone is going to walk down the same streets I do now, thinking "Rosella Eleanor LaFevre walked this pavement!"

Love Lesson No. 2: The Honeymooners

This is a series of lessons I've learned about love, arranged in no particular order. These lessons have been gleaned from personal experience, friends' stories, movies, books, magazine articles, etc. If you want to share a lesson you've learned about love, email me (rosellaeleanor@gmail.com).

The most popular post I've ever written here is "Phasin'," which has up to this very moment received 143 pageviews. In that post, I wrote about the honeymoon phase which is supposed to be the first 90 days of any relationship. Today, I still believe that the honeymoon phase does not have to end -- or it can, at least, last a much longer time than three months.

Chris and I, as of Valentine's Day one week ago, have been together eight months and it still feels like we're phasin'.

Protecting your writing

For over a year, I've covered the adjuncts' move to unionize for The Temple News. Two of the stories I've written about adjuncts were uploaded to a website called AdjunctNation.com without the permission of myself, my editors or the paper sponsor.

When I discovered that one of these stories had been made subscriber-only content with a false disclaimer that the compensation went directly to the writers, and that the other had no byline at all, I contacted a lawyer. While he couldn't represent my case because his firm only takes on businesses as clients, he offered some advice. While he said copyright usually lies with the writer from the moment a story is written, I probably had no case because I hadn't registered my work with a copyright office.

This happened about a month ago, and since then, the website has taken down the non-byline story (and hasn't paid me for my other story which remains online).

Today, I found an explanation of a writer's rights on the website of the American Society of Journalists and Authors. Because I don't want this to happen to anyone else (although I guess it is inevitable), I wanted to share this with you.

Wise Words: 'Puff up and bluff'

I've been a little nervous to pitch myself or my ideas to the media markets I want to see my byline in. But after reading the following advice from Laurel Touby, founder and senior vice president of mediabistro.com, I know I need to get over that.

"Sometimes you have to puff up and bluff about things. Too often, women feel as though they are not prepared for a task or an assignment and so they don't go after it. We expect that if we are great at what we do, someone will notice and offer us plum assignments. Well, that's not always the case. There are times when you have to say 'I can do that,' to a boss or potential employer and rise to the challenge. Don't be afraid. Guys do this all the time and get away with it!"

This advice is part of Jones New York's Little Black Book of Career Advice, a collection of wise words from lots of important women. It's a must-read!

Things we do that boys aren't supposed to see

When I'm alone, if even for just a few moments, I open the Photo Booth application on my MacBook. My face is one that looks different depending on the day, the way my hair falls, the lighting, the angle of the camera capturing it. For my own posterity, I sometimes like to take pictures, posing and puckering my lips, thereby creating a sort of growth chart of my good (and bad) looks. Some days I look older than others; some days I look cute and whimsical while on others I am serious and sad.

It's just something I do, but which Chris doesn't understand. He's finally caught me doing it, and I'm worried that him seeing this thing I'm embarrassed to do in front of anyone is the beginning of the end of our honeymoon phase.

Love Lesson No. 1: Vulnerability is important

This is a series of lessons I've learned about love, arranged in no particular order. These lessons have been gleaned from personal experience, friends' stories, movies, books, magazine articles, etc. If you want to share a lesson you've learned about love, email me (rosellaeleanor@gmail.com).

Scott Schuman, the Sartorialist, told New York magazine's Amy Larocca about how his fashion blogger girlfriend Garance Dore's fragility is becoming:

“I grew up reading designers’ ideas about women, like: She’s so strong, she rules the world, whatever. I wouldn’t want to be with a girl like that, who’s type A. Garance is smart, driven, all these great Corsican qualities of self-determination, but she’s totally fragile. Totally insecure. That’s a real human. That’s the whole package.”

It's very important, I believe, to be able to be fragile or vulnerable with our loves. No one can be type A, 100 percent of the time.

Improving my odds?

Yesterday, after a few months of writing disappointment after writing disappointment, the editor of Metropolis's VoxPop section bought an essay of mine.

If I've learned one thing about writing success, it's that there's really no way to guarantee it.

Literary magazines, for instance, tell you to read the submission guidelines and back issues so you can see what kind of fiction they publish. There usually is no connective tissue between the stories a magazine publishes. It seems to me that it is simply what they like when they read it, and the moods of editors -- like all other people -- can change twelve times a day.

A professor told me and my classmates that the only way to guarantee we get accepted is to keep submitting. Even that advice seems false to me. I've sent out stories to over 65 markets in the past two months and of the roughly 25-30 responses I've received, only one was an acceptance. And that was a shocker because the story was one of the few that I didn't consider very good.

While it frustrates me that there really is no way to improve my odds, I'm praying that my luck grows and that I start receiving more acceptances.

image via weheartit

Tips for a stellar journalism resume

My resume is my badge of honor. I'm constantly updating the thing, and I love any opportunity to show it off -- although I've never had a resume T-shirt. I've had a few questions from other journalism students about how to put together a resume. Here, I'll provide you with 8 tips for a stellar resume.

In my book, great reading inspires great writing

Last night, my little writer's group met. I say little because we're averaging at four writers per biweekly meeting. One of the members of the group, an adjunct professor I've interviewed for adjunct news stories and with whom I studied creative writing last semester, shared a 25-page story that just seemed to move me.

On first read the ending left me unsure of my feelings, but after skimming it during our discussion I realized how much I truly liked the character and how much I loved the story.

It was simply inspiring to feel that way, and I must say that the nights I spend surrounded by writers are some of the most inspirational I've experienced.

Who do you think you are?

"Why do you as a white person get to decide what people spend money on?" Gangly Girl said in response to one student's statement that money reparations paid to black Americans would be a radical idea because who knows what they'd spend it on.

Not thirty seconds before, she said, "They could spend it on sneakers."

Gangly Girl, who the hell do you think you are? You're really starting to piss me off.

Romantic words we have trouble saying

I want to grow old loving you. 

This was the sentiment of one of the more romantic Valentine's Day cards I saw at Rite-Aid yesterday. I wanted to buy it because I do feel that way about my boyfriend. Feeling this way and saying it out loud (or even in a card) are very different concepts.

Most girls, I think, myself included, are scared to actually share these words with our boyfriends. What if he thinks I'm crazy? Or, What if he doesn't feel the same way? Many of these are the same doubts that arise when we consider saying those three words, "I love you."

And certainly, our parents would think we're crazy. Who could know that they would want something for the rest of their lives? Sure, our perspectives will change over time.

V-Day: A Retrospective

It's my first Valentine's Day with a special someone -- my darling Chris -- and I've got a night class. Pssh! After years of fantasizing about having a boyfriend on V-Day and one year of supposedly being over the idea, I've got my wish and we're doing nothing.

But I don't want to complain. I've done my fair share of that over the years...

Playing devil's advocate

It's terribly awkward being a white kid in a race class. Everything you say can and will be used against you. I've been afraid to blog about this for the very reason that I'm beginning to fear speaking in class: that I be made to feel like a big bigot.

When I opened my mouth to offer an opinion of the implementation of guilt in teaching children about slavery and racism, I was attacked both times by some gangly white girl who works at the coffee shop and dresses like a hipster. What her beef with me was, I'll never quite know.

After reading Joe Feagin's book The White Racial Frame: Centuries of Racial Framing and Counter-Framing, our class was discussing counter-frames and news ways to counter the white racial frame -- the way American society rationalizes the systemic racism against black people.

I offered up my opinion that in teaching children about slavery and racism, invoking guilt can sometimes lead to resentment. Every year in school I learned about slavery and racism and every year I was made to feel like it was my fault an entire group of people had been oppressed for centuries prior to my birth. Over time, this has led to my feeling resentful. Why should I feel guilty for something I, nor my ancestors, had any part of? Furthermore, where was Feagin's mention of reverse prejudice, which I've seen in action.

Gangly Girl with her shorn black hair and blue leggings-as-pants attacked me for my mention of reverse prejudice. Then the conversation moved on.

Journalism Success: Tips for students

On Friday, Lena Chen posted an interview with freelance writer Caroline Kinneberg, which I guest edited, on her blog the ch!cktionary. This came as the result of contacting Lena to say I'd read an essay she wrote for Glamour magazine and how much I loved her website.

So far, I think I've been pretty successful as a writer. I have over 50 clips in my portfolio; I have written a two columns, covered a beat, written reviews of everything from film to literature, and blogged about relationships. Sure, I'm having trouble breaking into the big glossies -- Marie Claire, Cosmopolitan, and ELLE are magazines I would love to write for -- but most people do and I'm not out of college yet. The one thing I can say, however, is that I have a resume to rival most college juniors and I'm pretty proud.

Lately, I've writen articles for College Magazine's Career/Success section, and I've writen about my journalism experiences on this blog for a while. I'm going to start doing so more regularly.

I'm not sure how many journalism students read my blog, but here are my tips for getting those internships and other writing opportunities. Some of this I know from experience and the rest is what I wish I'd thought to do.

1. Maintain a blog.
I started blogging here before I finished high school and have continued to write about various topics here. One mistake I continue to make and which you should learn from is not posting regularly enough. It's definitely a good idea to plan out an editorial schedule. Also, you'd do well to focus on a specific subject or small range of subjects. Or, you should cover a wider range of topics with the same tone and perspective carried through, which is more the approach I've taken.

2. Build a blogging network.
Reach out to other bloggers who cover a similar topic or use the same tone/perspective. Link up and offer them the chance to write a guest post or ask to interview them. Either way, when you give them space in your corner of the World Wide Web, they'll link back to your blog on their own and their readers will likely become your readers. If nothing more, comment on other blogs and include a link to your own -- just be sure you're contributing something unique to the discussion. This is something I'm only beginning to do, but which I believe can never be done too early.

The condensed soup method of writing

Just read Kelly Klepfer's interview with novelist Connie May Fowler, whose most recent book How Clarissa Burden Learned to Fly was published by Central Grand Publishing in 2010, on Novel Journey. who revealed that she wrote this most recent novel first in a condensed 50-page version and then she expanded it. 

"I think fear prompted me to write How Clarissa Burden Learned to Fly in 50 pages," Fowler told Klepfer. " I feel if I can simply get it on the page, even in condensed form, I can then go it and turn it into a novel and not an abridged version."

I wonder how many other authors write this way.

What is good writing?

I've heard this question posed many times and I've heard several attempts at an answer to it. Some focus mostly on the technical aspects when talking of "good writing." Others speak more about the storytelling -- these are the elements of plot, character, message or theme, etc.

A good writer is someone who can mix both technical expertise and engaging storytelling and get it down on a page, I'd say. But even this is open to interpretation.

What is makes writing technically good? I wince every time I see "had"s and "will be"s. I cringe when I read the phrase "beginning to." And please, dear God, get your verbs right! Avoid clinical words like "displayed," I would tell you.

Then there's J.K. Rowling who uses plenty of helping verbs and has made more money than I can bear to think about. People love the Harry Potter series and while I admit that she's a fantastic storyteller, I can't bear to read the books because I think she's awful, technically.

"There are rules for good writing," Susan Cheever writes in Louisa May Alcott: A Personal Biography. She doesn't, sadly, list them.

What do you think the rules of good writing are?

On truth in fiction

Emily Dickinson's house in Amherst, Mass.

Over at Beth Kephart Books, the Dangerous Neighbors author posed the question "Truth or Fiction: Does It Matter When The Lines Get Blurred?"

For me, this is a particularly interesting question to consider, as my "fiction" is generally infused with a lot of "truth." Particularly seeing as I'm working on a new novel -- finally! -- which is the product of my experiences, those of friends, and fiction. A compost project, really. It took me a year and half since writing my last novel to come up with an idea I felt confident in.

And while Chris has said to me that he's a better fiction writer because he's much more imaginative -- which is true; he can come with anything -- I don't think that being as strongly inspired by real life makes me a bad writer. The fact of the matter is, like Kephart wrote, "The only interesting life, on the page, is the shaped life, the contemplated one, the one sifted for meaning and insight."

To be able to combine real life experiences with fictional elements in a way that gives them shape makes me, I think, at least a good fiction writer. I hope that I'm great, but I'll leave that up to the public to decide.

The hunter and the hunted

Reading Susan Cheever's Louisa May Alcott: A Personal Biography, I came upon this quote:

"If marriage is a woman's goal, her primary job is to make herself attractive to men. A look at clothes and advice we give young girls makes it clear that attracting a man who will be a provider is still one of the major jobs a young woman has in our culture. We give them Barbie dolls and makeup. We tell them to be calm and quiet and to remember that men are predatory hunters so that successful women must pretend to be tantalizing, elusive prey."

This is all quite true, unfortunately. My question, however, is how much of this, the seemingly unidirectional aim of young women toward marriage (or just a relationship) is a natural inclination? Is it a lingering survival instinct? And is there anything wrong with a young woman wanting simply to get married and have babies?

I'm not talking about myself, but I've heard a few girls say that her goal was to set up her life for a husband and children. My gut reaction is Oh my goodness, what's wrong with her? Although I do look forward to that part of my life, I also really want to achieve things like getting a book published and getting articles accepted at national women's magazines. Some of the girls I've known who have said such things about their life goals seem to have very few other passions.

True love is easy

I arrived home today after spending two days snowed in with Chris, and remembered that although my Harper's Bazaar had arrived a week or two ago, I hadn't found time to read it. Sitting down to catch up on "Cougar Town" and "Castle," I flipped through the national glossy magazine, which in the recent past has seemingly only published articles about topics other than fashion if they're book excerpts.

In the February 2011 issue of HB, there is a one-page article by Alex Kuczynkski, who normally covers beauty topics and wrote a book called Beauty Junkies, about the secret to a happy marriage. That secret? Ease.

She argues that one should not have to "work" at marriage; that the love should be easy and continue to grow, not diminish. "But the notion that we ought to choose to remain in love doesn't wash with me anymore," Kuczynkski writes. "Love is a commitment, but the idea of choosing to work at your marriage sounds like a drag."

I may not be married, but I definitely agree. Love should not be hard. And drama does not a happier or more meaningful coupling make.

On mating and our expectations of the opposite sex

After I met my (new) Prince Charming on OKCupid.com, my father, who has been single since he and my mother separated, decided to create an OKC profile. Since the time he signed up, he's logged many an hour winking at attractive women within an appropriate age range, and many of these leads have led to nothing.

Maybe a week ago, Dad winked at a woman and complimented her full, wavy hair. She responded and said she thought they weren't compatible physically, which she amended by saying they were interested in different body types, and then said that my father's plans for the future didn't match hers.

Similar communiques from other women have had Dad asking me why women are responding in this way to him. I've shared with him my theory, and I think I'm truly on to something. My theory is that a good portion of middle-aged women don't take online dating, and perhaps even dating in general, seriously. By middle age, it's possible that these women have built lives that make them happy and they've only got room for a man if he's "perfect."

I wrote "On women, superficiality and the new Prince Charming," on December 17th after reading a conversation on Facebook between two guys about how superficial women are. My original thesis was that women aren't too superficial and that even if we are, it's not necessarily the fault of women that we have unrealistic expectations.