Friends and the perpetual question

Julia attended Girls' High with me. Now she's here at Temple. We bumped into each other on the corner of 13th and Miss You and went for lunch.

As we waited in horrendous lines in the cafeteria, we talked about everything that's happened since graduation. A big topic? Guys. Naturally.

Since graduation, I've had a big relationship and a lot of firsts. Julia's dropped out of one college and spent a semester living at home and working, sinking into depression. (Understandable.)

Now that she's started at Temple, where there are actual living, breathing members of the opposite sex -- remember, we went to an all-girls school -- she's tasting the bouquet. (And feeling much happier.)

There's one boy, from her English class, who has shown interest in her and they've been spending a lot of time together. At lunch, she wasn't sure if she liked him back.

Julia's got a situation: she's saving herself for marriage. It's just something she believes in.

She wonders if this means that she'll have a harder time finding boys in college who would date her. (I don't know what to tell her.)

More than this, Julia hasn't always had an easy time when it comes to guys. Like me, she's had moments of deep depression. She's wondered if she'll ever find anyone to like her and possibly love her.

The more I talk to my friends, the more I realize what a common theme this is among young women. Sure, we're beautiful and intelligent, but that doesn't guarantee us an easy time in finding a connection.

And the world drives us crazy with the idea that if we don't find it, we'll be lost souls.

I wonder if young men feel the same way. Do boys ever feel desperately depressed at the prospect of being alone? And furthermore, do they ever look at a girl longingly, actually feeling like they need that girl in their life?

I know girls do this about guys. But is it a two-way street?

Since our lunch, Julia has talked to this boy from her English class and they have arranged a date for tomorrow. I hope it goes well for her.

And I hope my dreams of a certain athlete stop soon. I can't deal with the terrible feeling of loneliness upon waking after one of those beautiful dreams.

(The above image is of Mary-Kate Olsen and Ashley Olsen.)