A friend I graduated with lost her 3-year-old daughter on Friday. I'm speechless. Losing someone you love is hard, whoever it is and whatever your relationship. Chris said today -- about a different situation -- that grieving is a process and eventually you get over the loss. I'm not sure that you do. Another friend of mine lost his dad and he and his mother have not and say they will never get over his death.
More than that however, I question the merit of prayer. My friend who lost her daughter asked for the prayers of her friends through Facebook. And while I will pray for her because she asked, I wonder what good it will do. I guess I could pray that she "gets over it" but will she? I doubt it.
After disaster struck Haiti in January, Christians in all places were holding prayer circles for the Haitians. After hearing about one such event, I asked "What the hell is prayer gonna do?" My grandmother said, with great disappointment in her voice, "It helps, honey, it really does."
This coming from the same woman who later that week took one look at a bumper sticker that read "I'm blessed," and said, "I wonder what makes her think she's so blessed."
Clearly, my Grammy's religious beliefs are as deeply rooted as my own.
Whether prayer works or not, I hope that my friend will find a way to get through this ordeal and even if she never gets over it.
(The above image is of Susan Sarandon
.)
2 comments:
In the last year I can't tell you how many times people have said, "I'll pray for you" or "Your mom is in our prayers" and every time I kind of want to scream up to the sky and ask God why he doesn't listen and ask why he took her away. I feel very deeply for friend and even though I may not understand what it's like to lose a child, I certainly am familiar with loss. Tell your friend on my behalf I'm so sorry, and I wish I could tell her it would get easier. <3
I wish for both your sakes that it would get easier. And I'll pass on the message. <3
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